What’s the recommended way to throw the BS Flag?

Although there is no wrong way to throw the BS Flag, our intellectually advanced team of researchers has developed a list of methods that offer the “most opportune manner in which to launch a BS Flag such that it's intended target is unequivocally and beyond a shadow of a doubt chastised for said offense” – statistically speaking, of course.

Method 1 - Grab the wad of mystery filling in the middle of the BS Flag and hurl it (best for longer distances as it tends to be more accurate).

Method 2 - Hold one corner of the BS Flag and fling it (better for shorter distances, or group flagging where you don’t really care who it hits).

Method 3 - Toss it up in the air and catch it (use when you are close enough to the person to make direct eye contact and your unrelenting glare tells them exactly what they did to get flagged).

Method 4 - Hold the BS Flag by two corners and display it in the general direction of the person/people you want to flag (this “talk to the flag” method can be used as a less disruptive alternative to Method 3, or in areas where noise is prohibited such as libraries, movie theaters and churches.)

Method 5 - Hold the BS Flag and wave it around (recommended for large public gatherings, such as sporting events and meetings of Congress, where tossing the flag may cause you to lose it and/or be escorted out by security).


Are there any rules of etiquette I should use when throwing the BS Flag?

Why, how nice of you to ask! (Your troop called, they want their Scout back…) But since you asked, we feel obliged to share a few pointers that may make your BS Flag throwing more acceptable in polite company. If you throw the BS Flag:

• Throw the BS Flag, not its more profane cousin (which, incidentally, is also available here for anyone over 18). Personally, we prefer cousin potty-mouth, but then again, we’re kind of naughty.
  
• You must explain why you flagged the person. Otherwise, the BS Flag fairies will sneak in at night, steal your BS Flag and replace it with a flaming bag of bull pucky. (We are not kidding.)
  
• Be sensitive to feelings. If the person you wish to flag is crying, or is visibly angry or distraught, you may want to flag them when they’re not looking.
  
• Flagging “in absentia” is acceptable as long as you leave a note explaining the nature of the offense.
  
• Flagging “en masse” is also acceptable as long as you can see the look on the person’s face when they see a dozen BS Flags covering their desk, car, dirty laundry pile, front lawn, etc.
  
• If you use your BS Flag as a handkerchief, for goodness sake, rinse it out before tossing it at someone else.
  

What if someone throws the BS Flag at me?

• If you get hit with a BS Flag, you may be understandably sad, confused, upset or in denial about having just been flagged (thinking, of course, that your sh*t doesn’t stink). Please be assured, it does – at least some of the time. So does everyone else’s. That’s why we’re selling these things! But we digress…if you are flagged, we recommend that you take a deep breath and try to follow these suggestions:
  

Yes, as long as you use common sense and follow a few safety precautions: